Making Friends

I’ve had this message in my heart/mind for the past week and yet I still forgot to officially sit down and write about this until tonight. I’m feeling a little inspired right now because I’ve had a full day of friendship which makes me want to share.

One thing I’ve mentioned is how important making friends is for me, it’s something I think could benefit everyone but I’m not going to speak on your behalf (hint, hint). I’ve gone through periods in my life where I just feel like I haven’t been able to just find this friend who wants to hang out constantly and be close to me. I often think to myself about how difficult I find it to be to make new friends. Maybe this is easier for everyone else but I struggle with introducing myself to someone new and then what to ask after that’s happened. I hate awkward silence. Feeling that we’ve had an awkward moment makes me anxious further, it leads me fumbling over my words which leads to more awkward silence. Knowing that I feel this way I know someone else must also feel something similar, there are too many people in this world for me to be alone in this. So something I wanted to share is an acronym F. O. R. M. if you do business training you may have heard this before. My husband does work in sales and does a lot of networking, he learned this and just taught it to me this week for me to build relationships with my own part time business. As I was pondering this though I realized this can be applied to anyone wanting to get to know someone and have somewhere to go to when that awkward silence arises.

Family: Everyone has one!

Occupation: What do they fill their days doing? Some people have official jobs, parents who stay home, or those who are retired etc.

Recreation: What do they do when they aren’t doing their occupation? any hobbies, talents, etc.

Motivation: If they could join some cause what would it be? Are they for saving the Earth, feeding starving children, education etc.

I tried this out recently and it worked wonderfully! It gave us another hour to chat when it looked like it was a conversation that was going to die.

There will be risk involved. Something I’ve learned recently is this:

Taking risks leads to more opportunities to find security and connection in a relationship.

Does it suck to be rejected? Heck yes! It hurts a lot and that doesn’t change over time. I think we just come to know that the risk is worth it. How sweet is it to find a friend who reaches for you and that you can reach back to?

Challenge for this week: Identify your comfort zone, be aware of it. Then take a step out of it. Introduce your self to the other woman at the park or someone you find reading a book you enjoyed, after that happens try using F. O. R. M.

I’d love to hear your experience. I’d also like to hear from those who have their own methods to making friends, what works best for you?